Taking Personal Responsibility For Your Life Can Change Everything
It can change the relationship that you have with yourself, others, and the rest of the world.
“Blaming puts other people in charge of your happiness. Accepting responsibility empowers you to create your own.” ~ Melanie Tonia Evans
Taking personal responsibility for everything in our lives is something that’s not common, taught, or supported by others. Not by our teachers, parents, peers, and definitely not by society.
Most people prefer to point the finger, take the victim’s role, or get bailed out. And I get it. This may feel easier or maybe like the only option when in the moment.
But, the truth is, it’s actually harder and makes your situation 10x worst!
When you become helpless or fall into victim mode, prepare for a rough road ahead. Why? Because universal guidance and solution-oriented people are not attracted to negative energies.
You need to be willing to take personal responsibility for your circumstances, even when it doesn’t seem fair. If you start living this way, you’ll be in awe of how life starts working out for you, and in a way that you never in a million years imagined it would.
Let’s get into some of the ways you can start taking personal responsibility for your life in a mature, wise, and sustainable manner.
Point your thumbs at yourself instead.
I think most of us know by now that pointing the finger at others doesn’t help us out much. Sure we might get an immediate frustration release fix, but it doesn’t last very long, does it?
No.
We need to get better at pointing our thumbs at ourselves. This is where the real power and transformation reside. When I learned about taking personal responsibility for my happiness, my life first got harder (I’ll be honest, this part felt extremely uncomfortable). But, after a little while, it started to lighten up.
What I mean by my life getting harder, in the beginning, is I felt a lot of shame, guilt, and abandonment. I was consciously bringing my past to the surface, and it didn’t feel good at all. I felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders again, like it did when I was younger.
What was actually happening is I was finally dealing with and processing my past, the past that I’d been repressing and running from for over a decade.
However, as I was processing, healing, and clearing my baggage, my energy began shifting. After a couple of months of going through this emotional cleanse, I started feeling lighter, supported by a higher power, friends, and new wonderful opportunities were revealing themselves.
I ended up meeting a great guy too, who is now my fiancé. Lucky me!
Here’s my point, the moment you get into the habit of pointing your thumbs back at yourself, you can expect miracles to happen for you.
“A miracle is a shift in perspective.” ~ A Course In Miracles.
Stop ordering nachos at a Chinese restaurant, they don’t sell those there.
“Stop going to a Chinese restaurant for nachos. If you want nachos, go to a Mexican restaurant.” This is what my life coach said to me several years ago, and I’ll never forget it.
What can keep you feeling like a victim is continuously seeking closure from the person who has proved to hurt you over and over.
Every time you go back to your toxic family member, abusive ex, or backstabbing friend pleading for them to listen and understand how you feel, the more of your power you give away to them.
Please hear me: The people in your life who have given you ample evidence of their destructive behavior and actions toward you, time and time over, are not emotionally or psychologically capable of giving you what you need from them. They’re not who you go to for closure and genuine apology.
This is what I mean by “stop ordering nachos at a Chinese restaurant.”
Instead, you have to learn how to give yourself closure. You have to learn how to become the parent to yourself you never had. The best friend to yourself you never had. The partner to yourself you never had. This is your best recipe to follow. Okay.
You can absolutely learn how to do this for yourself by finding a good counselor, therapist, or life coach to help you.
Once you do, your life and relationships start getting really good.
It’s that self-respect and self-love piece that most are missing. It’s also another way of taking personal responsibility for your happiness.
Covid-19 is outside of your control, but your thoughts aren’t.
First off, this pandemic does suck! Let’s be crystal clear about that. It’s a major disruption, no doubt about it.
However, we can’t let it take over our psyche. That won’t work either.
Human beings are the most resilient creatures on earth. Look at us; we can have babies, create cures, make millions, fly to the moon, build online businesses from home, and bake up the most decadent batch of Christmas cookies ever!
Talk about navigating the unknown — you and I were 100% made for this. ;-)
I believe humanity is being given the opportunity to rewrite their story with less judgment and criticism. Why? Because we’re all in the same fucking boat this time. And weirdly, I see it as very comforting.
Polish up those thoughts of yours by reframing how you see things in your life right now. This is the second chance you didn’t ask for. But take it anyway.
Get to work on creating the life you truly want. Now’s the time.
Where will this new awareness take you?
When I came to an agreement with myself of taking personal responsibility for my present and future and started getting some good practice in doing so, shortly after that, I finally realized what real freedom felt like.
Tasting real freedom is addicting. Once you have it, there is no going back to the way things used to be.
When you become self-aware of who you truly are, your invaluable gifts, power within, personalized skills, strengths, and abilities — you’re off to creating a fulfilling life on your terms.
Period.
No one can stop you, not even your ego.
Sure, you may have doubts come up every now and then, that’s okay; you’re human. However, your new self-awareness and nonnegotiable commitment to always take personal responsibility for your life will get you back on track every time.
“There is only one person responsible for the quality of your life. That person is YOU.” ~ Jack Canfield
