5 Ways You Can Start Loving Yourself More This Week
You must learn to love yourself first.
Self-love is hard. It’s not something that comes naturally to us, and it for sure is not something that society encourages. If anything, self-love has a stigma for being taboo.
Learning how to build a healthy relationship with myself and take good care of my mental and emotional well-being growing up wasn’t a conversation in our house. And it’s not something that’s highly encouraged today within other relationship environments, either.
I believe this is one of the top reasons why so many women (men too) struggle with low self-worth and self-confidence these days. Let’s get to work on changing this, shall we?
Below are five ways you can start loving yourself more this week. You don’t have to implement all of these at once. It’s best to choose just one to begin with, practice it consistently for a week, and then pick another one to start working on next week.
Starting with just one new self-love habit at a time is key, and it’s sustainable.
1. Tuck yourself into bed at a decent time.
I don’t know about you, but I used to be someone who rebelled against going to bed early enough to where I get seven to eight hours of shut-eye a night. I would stay up very late binge-watching Lifetime and Bravo. I paid for it the next morning, though, waking up sleep-deprived, anxious, and downright not wanting to face the day. Binging on these T.V. shows helped me escape my reality, and they also kept me further away from the things I needed to do to get my life on the right track.
Make a commitment to yourself starting three days a week you’re going to turn off all electronics by 9:00 pm, floss, and brush, wash your face, and in bed by 9:30 pm with a good book to read or journal to write in.
Doing this might be challenging for you at first. Creating any new habit is always hard in the beginning. But, you have to start somewhere, so be patient and have grace for yourself. This new self-love habit will become second nature soon enough.
2. Read anything on personal development for at least 5–10 minutes a day.
I can’t express enough how powerful reading personal growth books have been for me. Traditional schooling is missing hitting on this topic big time. Most teenagers and young adults never think of picking up a book on self-awareness, personal accountability, goal setting, or how to use their imagination for working out best-case scenarios. Many people today give their mind power away to worry, anxiety, and fear.
“Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18.1% of the population every year.” Reports ADAA, the Anxiety And Depression Association of America.
Let’s get better at educating ourselves and empowering our minds instead.
Whatever you’re struggling with right now in your life, for example, low self-worth or self-confidence, toxic relationship patterns, or maybe it’s how to start your own business. Hop onto Amazon, type in that problem or topic you’re struggling with into the search key. Read through the book titles that show up, and invest in buying yourself a few of them right away!
Your personal development is absolutely without question the best investment you’ll ever make in yourself.
Now that you have a couple of books on your nightstand and the kitchen table. Commit to reading for at least 5 to 10 minutes each morning while enjoying your hot cup of matcha or coffee. If you’re not a morning person, no problem, make time in the evening before you go to sleep.
3. Commit to exercising a minimum of 3 days a week for 20–30 minutes.
Many of my clients like to set these grandiose health and fitness goals for themselves right off the bat and get so disappointed with themselves for quitting on day four. They think something is wrong with them and that living a healthy lifestyle isn’t possible for them. These women couldn’t be further from the truth.
Think about it. If you’re someone who isn’t naturally athletic, have hardly any experience with what to do in a gym, or haven’t exercised much at all in the last few years. Setting a goal to run for 30 minutes a day six to seven days a week is not realistic. It’s setting yourself up for failure. So, please, stop it!
Be willing to start with one small step at a time. The better you get with taking baby steps in creating new healthy habits, the easier it will be for you to follow through consistently. And consistency is what yields long-term results!
For example, write down in your calendar that on Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday evening, you’ll go for a 30-minute walk around the neighborhood while listening to your favorite podcast on iTunes.
4. Cut down alcohol consumption.
I believe becoming more mindful of how much alcohol one drinks is a great sign of self-awareness and self-love. Like I mentioned at the beginning of my article, self-love is hard. True self-love is the willingness to be with your feelings, all of them, the “good” and “bad” ones, no matter how uncomfortable they are. It’s listening to what your feelings and emotions are telling you, and being with them, so you can work on processing them in a healthy way.
This will be impossible to do if you’re suppressing your feelings and emotions with excessive drinking. Pouring myself 2 to 3 glasses of wine a night five to six days a week was my “feel better” strategy for years. Then, I learned a better way, a healthier way, to care for, and love myself.
Several weeks after I decided to cut way back on my drinking, I began to feel more self-aware, confident, and clear-headed. This was wonderful! It also led me to discover new hobbies (like my passion for writing), saving more money, and ultimately launching a whole new career that I’m in love with.
Not a bad payoff, huh? Give this self-love tip of drinking less alcohol a shot. You might be very surprised by what the new benefits and rewards end up being for you, too.
5. Spend less time with those who drain your energy.
This one was challenging for me because I used to be a huge people-pleaser. I wanted everyone to like me, feel comfortable around me, and I hated being alone. Then I realized how unhealthy being around low vibe, chronic complainers, and constant worriers was for my mental and emotional well-being.
When I started devouring books on personal development (Tip 2 in this article), it became clear to me that I should set boundaries with certain friends, family, and associates. I did this subtly. I didn’t make it a big ordeal. I simply spent less time with specific people in my life who drained me and who I felt took advantage of my kindness. I started checking out women networking groups near me and made new friends. The women I met in groups over the past several years are some of my closest friends to this day.
Raising your standards for who you surround yourself with, give your time and energy to, and heart to is a massive step towards self-love and self-respect. Be selective with who you choose to spend your time with. You’re worthy of being loved and respected, but you have to be the first to love and respect yourself.
You probably agree with me by now that practicing self-love is no walk in the park. It takes conscious effort and the willingness to take full responsibility for your happiness. It’s not just about spending money on yourself to get a relaxing massage, beautiful new hair-style, or new pair of brand name running sneakers.
Loving yourself takes courage, practice, commitment, and the willingness to set boundaries in most cases. When you start practicing these daily behaviors and actions, you can start expecting your life to feel really good!
